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December 25, 2007

12/25/2007 - HEART-SHAPED POTATO JESUS TURNS 1!

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MERRY CHRISTMAS! In keeping with the overall holiday theme, I'm here to remind you that the infamous "Heart Shaped Potato Jesus" turns 1! Yes, Christmas is all about the birth of Christ but that's almost secondary now that the Heart Shaped Potato Jesus is celebrating a birthday! As you'll see in the photo, I put a decorative bow on him to mark the occasion.

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December 24, 2006

2006 CHRISTMAS WITH MY CHARLIE BROWN TREE

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MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Being a huge Charlie Brown fan, I have my own version of the Charlie Brown tree - a miniature tree that, year after year, is dwarfed by the huge bay window at the front of the house. It's Christmas! As I write this, I'm waiting for my three daughters to come over from their mom's house for what will be their best Christmas ever! And, because they will be here, it will be my best Christmas ever, as it is every year that they are here. For the next 48 hours, I promise to not stir the pot, to not pick on anyone, to not expose sex predators in the ministry, to not comment about our Governor's inefficiency, to not openly criticize American citizens who are too lazy to learn English ... and so on. After all, it's Christmas. I'm just going to sit and admire my little tree and say this to you: "Good Grief! Merry Christmas!"

December 23, 2006

12/23/2006 - MENORA OKAY - NATIVITY SCENE NOT

I was going to get around to posting this, but have been swamped by the holidays. Thanks to Daren Handley for passing this along:

Washington Capitol: Menorah OK, Nativity Scene Not
Read the article by Clicking here.

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December 14, 2006

12/14/2006 - WAKE UP WALMART - THE FREAKS ARE ON THE LOOSE!

Oh wow. Just when I think I've run out of good things to post on my blog, I turn on my radio and hear some egg-head religious leader advising me not to shop at Walmart because "Jesus would not shop at Walmart." Apparently, there is a union-led movement calling for evangelicals and anyone else to boycott Walmart because of alleged and supposed injustices by Walmart upon our society. Though I normally would not direct any traffic to raving lunatics, you can click here to read more of what these idiots are up to.

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December 13, 2006

12/13/2006 - HEART SHAPED POTATO JESUS APPARITION

OMG! Let me repeat that: OMG!!! I'm going to be rich! I can pay off my house and retire!!! You see, while rummaging around in a bag of potatoes, I came across a heart-shaped potato with an apparent apparition of Jesus on it! I take this as a sign from God that I truly am the honorable Reverend Jim - the man with a plan for mankind, the blessed one who will probably now finally be able to announce an impending IPO based on this holiest of fruit (or vegetable?). We all remember the lady who got so much money for the image of Mother Mary on her burned grilled cheese sandwich - but that pales in significance beside a genuine heart-shaped potato with the image of Jesus on it! Click to see the potato and to read more about it:

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December 9, 2006

12/09/2006 - THE SEA-TAC SCROOOOOOGE

While watching KIRO 7 News this morning, a story was aired about the dismantling of Christmas trees at the Sea-Tac (Seattle) International airport. According to the news anchor, a "prominent religious figure" complained that the Christmas trees at the airport were exclusive of all other religions and, in all likelihood, offensive to some. Because of this one complaint, workers are busily dismantling all the Christmas trees and packing them away while airport officials "review their holiday policies."

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October 12, 2006

10/12/2006 - I DON'T LIKE OVER-THE-TOP RELIGIOUS PEOPLE

Okay, I have to kick off this blog category with something, so I might as well just peel off my clothes and jump into the water: I do not like some religious people. In fact, I would go so far as to say that they are the downfall of our society as a whole.

I am a Christian - and a believer. I am spiritual. I am not religious. I'd rather drink a beer than to get baptized, and a good bratwurst is better than any communion wafer. I don't feel a need to congregate with others on Sunday, nor do I need to wallow in my misery and "fellowship" with those who can't think of anything better to do on a Sunday morning. My beliefs and my spirituality are private things - immediately seen for what they are as I move through society, and evidenced by being a good parent, a stable employee, a volunteer, a productive member of society. To me, sending a "prayer request" chain e-mail is no different than pitching Tupperware. Send me one, and you're on my black list. Call me. Let me know what the problem is and I'll pray and do what I can do to help. But, for God's sake, lay off the pity-party broadcast emails. As much as Hallmark probably hates online greeting cards, I'm sure your Lord might take offense at you trying to hijack the process with your proclamations of need and despair. It's cheaper to send an e-card than to buy a stamp, and it's an easy way out to "evangelize" via email than to do what your good Savior did - putting his feet to the street and spreading his gospel the hard way.

I can spot the difference between a religious person and a deeply spiritual person about twenty yards out - plenty of time to avoid the former and trust the latter.

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